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In a study of undergrads, 35 percent engaged in real sex within four weeks of a breakup. But while the study confirmed that people have sex in attempt to Hwo over an ex duhHow to deal with my ex hookup someone else never witb answered whether rebound sex is actually helpful or damaging to the post-breakup healing process. Is rebound sex an emotional crutch, the relationship equivalent to junk food that tastes delicious but leaves you sluggish and sick? Lisa Wade, chair of the sociology department at Occidental College in California. She notes that the study focused only on undergrads, which may skew the results because college tends to have a more pervasive hookup culture than the general population, thus encouraging rebound sex.

The year-old production manager from New York slept with someone a day after ending her relationship with her boyfriend of a year and a half. Dior, like most of the breakup sex-havers we spoke with for this story, requested we do not publish her last name. Cheat Sheet A speedy, smart summary of all the news you need to know and nothing you don't. You are now subscribed to the Daily Digest and Cheat Sheet. We will not share your email with anyone for any reason. Maybe they are having sex right this very second. They probably skipped the motorcycle ride and decided to spend the day in bed. Except your role is being played by someone who might be sexier, more fun or more interesting.

You see your Ex — the happy, sweet, fun one you first fell in love with — sharing the best parts of themselves and hiding the rest.

The joy and passion you envision for them is made all the more cruel by the stark contrast to your own silent bed. You lay sleepless, writhing in agony at the injustice. You feel trapped… in your own head. Your heart starts racing, you feel nauseous, and you are filled with pain and rage. Being victimized by these intrusive images is incredibly traumatizing. Ruminating does not bring any value to your healing process.

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Instead, it rx you from moving forward. Self-Awareness, Mindfulness, and Shifting. You are sitting at a table, eating a bowl gookup cereal. Anchoring yourself to the reality of the present moment by using your senses creates a protective barrier between you and intrusive thoughts. Take notice of what is around you and focus on specific targets. Notice the colors, shapes, things you can see in the room around you. What are you aware of hearing, right now? Yammering in a coffee shop. Music through your headphones. The hum of the refrigerator in the kitchen. The chair under your butt.

Your feet on the floor. The breath in your nostrils.


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